In this dynamic world with so many distractions, it is evident that children lose interest and focus but modern parenting is all about moving away from toxicity to bringing positivity to children and parents today should understand the ambitions and strengths of their children. It is imperative to know the interest of the child by engaging children in such activities helps boost confidence, build focus and keep them engaged to further push their limits in the activities that interest them.
No one can downplay the importance of a confident, curious, resilient personality and raising kids with such traits along with humility and respectfulness is a dream for parents but it is important to note that even though education plays a critical role in shaping this personality, there are so many other ways to achieve a happy, accomplished and meaningful life for your child apart from academics. Parents must understand that and convey the same to their child from early stages of their life.
In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Arpita Joshi, MD (Psychiatry), DNB (Psychiatry), Consultant Psychiatrist and member of clirnet community, shared, “Topping an examination does not ensure successful life and failing the same does not guarantee future failures. Role of a parent is to guide and support their children while they forge their own paths. One simple thing is to be kept in mind, no percentage is more important than our children. Our only comparison should be with ourselves. If a child is performing better than before that should be enough reason to rejoice, irrespective of their position in class.”
She added, “Regarding competitive exams and career deciding entrance exams, always make a list of at least five options in chronological order beforehand. So if the first option is out we can have the next desirable option. This will definitely reduce stress from parent’s and as well as from children’s minds.”
Echoing similar thoughts, Ujjwal Singh, President and CEO of Infinity Learn by Sri Chaitanya, said, “Acing an exam with high marks is excellent but to what extent will these marks matter ten years down the lane? Today, scoring 60% or more is good enough to enrol in top courses and colleges for higher education. So, what’s the point of running after scoring 100/100 by affecting your mental health when scoring average or above average can also get you a seat in a good university? Parents should teach the same to their children. They must encourage them to score well but without being stressed over it. Remember, this is not the end.”
Shefaley Phebe, Clinical psychologist at Peakmind, advised, “Exam results time can be nerve-wracking for children. This is why, as parents, it is important to be there for your children, especially when the results are not as expected. First, communicate your support and acceptance – help your children understand that these results are not the end of the world and encourage them to talk to you about what they are going through. Secondly, help them put things into perspective – it’s not necessary to rush into decisions, instead, you could help them reflect on what has happened and use this learning to explore ways to achieve their goals.”